Relosing control

This is a dream from 23 March. It’s really long so I’ll try to keep the language less elaborate.

I was waking up several times during this dream, but at all times it’s a little unclear whether I really woke up or it was a part of the dream. Also, I knew that I was dreaming, or half-knew, during most of the dream.

I was at home, in my current living room. I don’t remember that much about this part of the dream. I was going on a holiday and was packing lots of different items. I was stressed and looking for something, a piece of a cell phone, searching through bags.

I woke up in my bedroom, but in my old apartment now. I heard sounds from the living room, probably my mother. I called for her to come in, but she didn’t answer. I might have really been half-asleep at this point, really hearing things (having hypnagogic hallucinations). I heard lots of sounds from the apartment, and suddenly the sound of something heavy falling down. I was unsure of whether I was dreaming or awake, or was in my current apartment. Calling out didn’t help. I held my ears to shield from the noise.

I checked the cell phone by my bed. If the buttons didn’t work or a piece was missing, it must be a dream, I thought. It didn’t work, so I knew then I was dreaming.

I was in my old room, standing and looking in the mirror I had on the wall. Around my neck, under the shirt, was a necklace with some trinkets hanging from it. It was very important. I then tried to change my face by willing it so. A girl was there, maybe A (who I used to be great friends with growing up). I grew horns, but they were small. Then fangs; they were needle sharp in front. This was no good, so I started over. Now the corner teeth were fangs, but all my teeth grew like dripping icicles; all uneven. It was very difficult. Suddenly I had bat wings growing out of the top of my head, and I thought this was okay. I wanted bigger horns, but they became uneven and strange. I broke off the bat wings, which turned into a chicken-like bird. It was hurt somehow; I set it free through the window.

I was at work somewhere. (The place didn’t resemble any place I’ve been). I knew nobody there. Then I was flying through the rooms, maybe in an archive room, trying to avoid a flying villain. It was like an anime. He was throwing long pointed sticks like darts. I tried to avoid them like in the show (actually there is no show like this that I’ve seen), but was hit. The sticks were poisonous, but for some reason I wasn’t harmed. I threw some sticks back.

I was walking again, at this workplace. I was tired of it and wanted to leave. I went through a door. The corridor was leading down; it had gray cement walls, like a parking house. It got darker and was very scary and nightmarish. I though that this is the part were I should turn back, but like always in dreams like this, I thought, I wasn’t turning back. But then a door in the wall opened. There was some guy who lived there. He seemed annoyed, but allowed me to go through his apartment to get to the outside. He was also going out, so we went together. This guy was blond and tall. I wanted him to like me. We walked somewhat uphill, beside a street with traffic. We crossed where there was a roundabout in the middle of the street. I ran ahead. There was a bus coming, bus 54 going downtown. On the other side of the street we ran back downhill again, towards the bus stop. But it wasn’t the bus we wanted. On the side of the street where we had come from, we now saw flashing white lights and something projected on the wall of the building. It was my workplace, and the guy worked at the same place. It was some important event, which we had both ducked out of. We were kind of hiding behind some bushes or a bench.

There was an open area beside the bus stop, a small distance from the street. There were lots of people there, old class mates from junior high. I was trying to remember the trinkets I had seen in an earlier dream (earlier part of this dream), and this made them appear. These were important clues to my actual life! The first one was a key. I thought it was the key to my apartment, but A said it was the key to hers. I gave it to her. I made a list of the items, with three columns: an index number, a drawing of the item, and what it was. First, I wrote “1 <drawing> key.” The next few items were made of cheap plastic: There was a clear purple cube, and then maybe a flat square of some clear color. It was difficult cataloging this because of all the chatter and noise around me, and people hanging around. Some guy was sitting on me as I was laying down on my side to write.

At one point I was talking to a girl I used to have a crush on, a friend of two girls named A and M (not the same A as before), who I remember as the two “nice girls” in class. (In reality there was no third girl who was a friend of A and M, and the girl I really had a crush on was someone else.) Later I was talking to some other people, saying I had talked to this girl, but now I couldn’t remember her name, which I thought was funny.

Later again, at the same place, but near some hedges, I was trying to remember the last item. It was brown or beige, of an unknown shape, and with engravings. They were the same two letters repeated: ATATATA… But then I realized it only looked like that; it was actually real words, the first being “the”. Then the item disappeared. Was it my thumb? I studied it but couldn’t find any engravings.

Now I was in my grandfather’s room (when he was alive). But it was different. The floor was felt, the colors were orange and purple, and there was strange lighting. The furniture was lined up in the center. I knew I could just lie down there and close my eyes, and I would wake up. The “bed” was just an empty area between the furniture. I lied down and closed my eyes.

I woke up in my current apartment again. I thought, why not dream of a hot celebrity here in bed with me? I didn’t really think it would work. I was half-asleep now, and felt beside me, but it was just a pillow. Then I was in my old room again, and I was there with Debrah Farentino. (This was definitely because I’ve been watching old episodes of Hooperman lately.) The problem was that “I” was not me, but another person. So I was there watching Debrah and this other guy being “me,” and I said that I should be me. I then chased him out, which he wasn’t pleased about. But Debrah and I were now having a fight, and she left or went somewhere. I called for her. Someone answered, a person in the hall, standing on a stool facing the wall. It was a tall person with sand colored hair, who seemed to have stubble, but I wasn’t sure if it was a man or a woman. I tried calling again.

Then I was outside. There were some tiered rows of seats (benches), and Debrah was sitting there with some other people. I was standing beside her. Then she started decomposing, sinking into a pile of rotting vegetable matter. The pile was mostly brown, with insects crawling around in it, but I could still see her face in it. Either she or the other people said I had to pick her up and embrace her. Reluctantly I lifted her up and held her close. She had no arms or legs and was still rotting. I was feeling for insects crawling on my skin. It was summer and a lot of people were around, and it was on Aker Brygge, near Oslo harbor. I put her down on the pavement and she started to grow, turning back into Debrah. But as she did so she moved artificially and I heard mechanical sounds. Incredulous, I asked in a mocking way: And how long is the guarantee?

Earnestly she called to the side: Keith, what’s the guarantee?

Two months, was the reply.

Screw this, I thought, and willed myself to wake up. This worked.

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Giant robots at sea

A dream from a few days ago, 5 May.

The dream was about workers on big marine robotic vessels. These vessels were not ships, but huge humanoid robots (in that they had arms and legs). They were probably walking on the seabed rather than traveling on the surface. The crew in the dream was working above sea level. It seems I wasn’t personally in this dream, but I was there somehow still.

Embarking and disembarking were done by walking along the arms and hands of a robot, which it stretched out to the shore. The last part of walking ashore was atop the fingers, which were so long that it took a few minutes. A robot’s fingers were not round (that is, their cross section) but rather polygonal. To create a walkway it held two fingers together, each one forming a slanting side with no level floor in between, crew members having to step on these angled sides.

There was always the danger of a robot deciding it didn’t like the crew members and closing the two fingers, crushing the humans. This didn’t happen very often, but of course the thought of it took an emotional toll on the crew. A female crew member was contemplating whether feigning illness was a viable way of avoiding going ashore, because this time she feared for her life.

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Girls are more helpful than Swedes

I found this dream from 9 June 2011. This is the last of my old dreams except the epic one from 1997. Don’t know when I’ll get around to doing that one.

I was on my way to class, in a building that was a mix of Manglerud High school and the Vilhelm Bjerknes building at the Blindern university. The walls were made of red bricks. I was ten minutes late. I went up a floor towards the classroom, but at the top of the staircase the door was bricked off; I was startled and almost lost my balance, since there was nowhere to stand between the stairs and the new wall. I then remembered they had been doing renovations.

Back on the ground floor I went to the info desk to find out how I could get to my class. Only Swedes were working there. The guy I asked made a phone call to find out. I grabbed a pen and post-it, and jotted down the directions he repeated on the phone, sort of in code form. He did the same thing, and when he was done, we had the same notes on our post-its, except he had a few codes there from before. He was then going to explain the directions to me, but first he went on to explain his earlier notes, kind of to boast about how clever he was with his little codes. It was just mundane office stuff. I was getting impatient, and glanced at my watch. I was twenty minutes late now.

Somehow the info desk people didn’t find out anyway. Annoyed I asked incredulously, So you mean to tell me the info desk at this school can’t tell me how to get to a classroom? Well, I’m sure some of the students know, he said, and stopped a girl at random who was walking by. She seemed very friendly and suggested she show me the way there. She said we had to walk to T’s office to get to the other floor. (T is a guy from my boardgaming club, who doesn’t work at a school as far as I know.)
That’s at the other end of the building! I said.
That’s right, she said. I can take you there later too if you want.
I thought this was an odd thing to say, I couldn’t see why I would need the way shown to me twice.

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Above it all

I’m having dreams-within-dreams with increasing frequency, that is to say, dreams wherein I wake up from a dream, often several times. (I think maybe it’s caused by thinking about writing down dreams for this blog.)

I was at some party with lots of people. Many things happened, but I only recall fragments, and will skip these events.

I woke up on a bus. C, a friend of mine from before (the same person from the dream of March 16) was also there, and a couple of other people. These had all been to the party. What was that thing anyway? I asked C. I think it was an event, he said. Maybe also connected to gaming, since I met a lot of gamers there, someone said. Still I was unsure whether I had really been to that party or if I’d dreamt it.

I think maybe that party was just a dream, I said. We had now left the bus and were walking on a country road. But that would mean this is also a dream, I continued. The others didn’t answer. I’ll prove it, I said, and walked down to a lake near the road. I planned on doing something outrageous that would only occur in a dream. I was barefoot anyway, so I walked until the water reached my ankles. But as a tank ship passed by quite closely the water seemed dirty somehow, and I had second thoughts.

I thought I’d try something else. The others were now a little ahead of me. I tried to fly, willing myself straight up into the air. It worked, and I flew past them. I looked back and down at the road, the trees around it and the people. It all looked like a plastic film. I reached down and picked up one if the guys, peeling him off the film. I held him between my fingers, a flat plastic, lifeless figure. I dropped him back onto the film, and then flew down and landed on the road. Everything now looked normal again. But the guy was lying on the ground, the others standing over him, and he looked like he was hurt.

I woke up in my old room, in the apartment I had lived with my mother and brother. They were there, and my brother was still a little boy. In this part of the dream I tried to “figure out” what I had dreamt, and also communicate it to my mother somehow. It involved a cell phone or pad like device with a touch screen, and I had great difficulty making it do what I wanted. I don’t remember much detail.

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My summer vacation in France (not really)

Also a dream from tonight.

I was watching a movie or TV program. A scene showed the view from inside a car. A sign on a wall at the side of the road read C doesn’t live here. (C is guy I actually used to know. The sign had his full name, which is quite an unusual name.) I had to figure out this mystery, and so I went to visit the people living around where this was filmed. It was a man and a couple of women, living in a luxurious house with a swimming pool. The man seemed like a movie star or a rock star. It turned out they had put the sign up as some kind of joke, because they had had an encounter with C some time ago. He had come to sell them something, but they weren’t interested. For some reason he had hung around anyway, coming back several times. He had become interested in one of the women, pursuing her. They thought he was kind of pathetic. I was sitting outside by the pool, listening to this story. It was summer. I had a glass of Coke with ice cubes in it. I was trying to read the ice cubes, as they were each shaped like a letter, but it was hard because of the dark color of the liquid and the fact that they were partially melted. What I really wanted to do was rearrange them in some way, so as to use the ice cubes as a search engine to find out more about C and his history with this place.

Some parts of the dream may be missing, but I was now in a big house, with several rooms, halls and hallways. The decor was brown, classy, with leather and dim lights, and there were lots of people. I was walking down the stairs and C’s old girlfriend was walking past me. She didn’t recognize me. I thought that I had to consult my mother about this. (This is probably partially based on reality, since it turned out some time ago that my mother was working with C’s old girlfriend. She had never met her, but I realized it was her from what my mother happened to say about her.)

I went down the stairs to a big hall and to a table where who I thought was my mother was sitting with some other people. The person said that he was in fact F (a friend of mine). I then realized that they just looked alike. (In real life they don’t, and he doesn’t look like a woman nor my mother like a man.) I said to him that of course I knew it was him, because I recognized his voice. F told me that mothers and such were not allowed in with the others, and had to stay in tents outside. It seems that this was some kind of convention. I asked him whether I could grant my mother permission to come inside, but he said that only the management could grant that permission.

I went outside to see her. Since I had no idea where the camp site was, I decided to call her on my cell phone. The place I was leaving was a huge castle, very tall. The word château came to my mind. There was a beautiful landscape all around, hills, clear blue sky, warm weather. Quite a distance behind the castle was another one, stretching up into the sky, its top in a haze. There were no other building in view. I reached my mother on the phone, but it was a bad connection. She told me the name of the place where she was; it was a French sounding name. I had no idea where it was and there was no one around. I was walking down a road, but didn’t know whether it was the right direction. She said it was very cold and lots of snow where she was. A strong gale was blowing on her end, making it difficult to hear what she was saying as she was trying to explain her location. I said that it was odd, because the sky was blue where I was.

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Taking care of Bill

Dream from tonight.

Bill Murray was standing in front of a mirror. He was pulling something from his eyes, like dead skin covering them. This caused his eyes to turn blood red around the irises. It somehow changed his personality, and he was now vindictively searching for some person to harm him. It was up to me to calm Bill down, and I lead him by the arm, taking him to see his friends. The only one I remember is Martin Short, but there were other actors and comedians too. His eyes turned gradually white again. This dream ended very positively, with Bill and I walking down the street with lots of other celebrities. Quite a few of them had died but were now alive again, which we were all very happy about.

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The details of this dream are very fuzzy, but what I remember is kind of interesting. This is just the very end of course.

I woke up in my grandfather’s room, on a mattress on the floor. (I have slept in my grandfather’s room many times but on the fold out sofa, not on the floor.) I got up and tried to recollect my dream, telling it to my grandfather and some other people. There had actually been three different parts to this dream, but apparently they had all involved working on a farm in the old days. My grandfather said that it was good that I got to know a bit about how it was in the old days. But I pointed out that what I dreamt might not actually have been a good representation of reality.

I was also trying to remember names of people in the dream, writing them down on a piece of paper, but couldn’t remember all of them. I had five or six written down, none of them names of people I actually know. (I’m pretty sure this was false, since I don’t usually dream names of people.)

In one part of the dream I was conveying, I had actually woken up from another dream. I pointed to the mattress where I had just woken up and said that in my dream I had also woken up there. Now it might very well be that I hadn’t actually dreamt that I dreamt that I woke up from a dream. Instead maybe I just confused the occurrence of me waking up on the mattress with actually having also dreamt that I did.

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Umbrella logic

A dream from 11 May 2011.

I was in some kind of battle or contest like a computer game, but feeling very real. It had just been revealed that I was a very powerful kind of something. A medium sized umbrella had just emerged and opened on top of my head or hat, and this umbrella was both a powerful weapon and a means of flight.

But then a bunch of other guys, maybe five or six, revealed that they too were of the same kind. Umbrellas opening they flew towards me, and it was very scary. This was taking place in some kind of school building, with lots of halls and passage ways (as in many of my dreams). I flew towards them and managed to go up towards the ceiling and past them, but they turned around and to my dismay they were faster. The speed in general was not great, barely faster than running. It felt more like hovering than flying.

Suddenly a second group of about the same number appeared before me. I managed to do some evasive maneuvers, and by a force of will I picked up speed and seemed to be losing them. I went around several corners. In desperation and fear that they would suddenly catch up I thought to go somewhere unexpected without them seeing. I flew into a class room, and realized the only way out was through a window. I opened one as quickly as I could, hoping it wouldn’t be locked. It wasn’t and I fell, then hovered, toward the ground, the window being several stories up. I went around a corner outside, and then weighed the possibilities: Getting away from the school towards some buildings and trees, with the possibility of the others seeing me fleeing through a window. Or hunkering down in a small spot I’d just noticed. I did the latter. It was behind a low wall, between the building and a trash can.

I remember thinking about the apartment building I’d looked at, the trees, the school, the very real smell of the trash can and the physical feeling of where I was. Knowing then that it was a dream, I thought about all the other times I’d had dreams of places that seemed very real and then waking up wondering if I was indeed channeling into my dream a real place where I’d never been in waking life. (In reality I have never wondered this while awake, but in this dream that’s what I thought.) I thought that this time I had to gather some clues about this place, so that when I woke up I could try to find out where it was, and whether it was indeed a real place.

Then I woke up.

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Gimme that old time Stygian

I dreamt a lot tonight, but only two distinct parts of the dream I remember well.

I was in a gloomy cellar. It seems I was there willingly. There were three doors, each one a doorway to Hell, very reminiscent of Clive Barker’s Hellraiser (although these doors seemed to be there all the time). Like in Hellraiser, there were labyrinthine corridors on the other side. I can’t remember being afraid.

The hallways to which the three doors lead all connected on the other side, so it didn’t seem like it made a difference which of the doors one went through.

But at one point it became apparent that the middle door had to be opened. The door, or perhaps Hell itself, made this clear by turning the door invisible so that we (or I?) could see it leading down a corridor to another door. The middle door then was like a screen, zooming in on the other door, even zooming so far that this other door appeared bigger than natural and one could only see a part of it. Then the view panned down to the handle of that door, which was pink and rubbery and shaped like a smooth erect penis. (I associated this with the sexual depravity of Hellraiser, the whole pain/pleasure thing.)

The later part of the dream was quite different. It’s strange to me now writing down these two passages, because they seem so related. But when I woke up, the connections didn’t occur to me, they were just the two parts of the dream I remembered best.

I was on an open-air plaza of a gigantic structure, some sort of temple. It was daylight. There were two big buildings, one to each side, sort of like mosques. I think we were high above sea level, maybe on a mountain. Everything was of stone, seeming like sandstone.

A priest was there, my superior or someone of authority. We were to perform a ritual, maybe a summoning. Between us was a casket, maybe a little smaller than a human sized coffin. It was quite plain looking, maybe wooden, with a perfectly rounded lid. What was in it was of some importance, but I don’t think I knew what it was, and maybe the revelation of the contents was part of the ritual.

It’s not clear what we did as part of the ritual, but for each step, we somehow went higher up on a tower. Either the tower was already there, but I couldn’t see anything higher up than the level I was on, or the tower appeared one level at a time. Each level was different, but made of stone.

When we were very high up, there was another casket there, exactly like the first one but much bigger. The priest and I were standing on each side of it. I’m not sure where the first one was now, but I think we had it with us the whole time. The level we were on consisted of not much else than this casket, in any event nothing to stand on except the floor directly underneath the casket — so we had to stand on our toes, tucking them under the casket, where there was a crack because of its four feet. I was deathly afraid to fall down; behind me there was no support, just a plunge hundreds of feet down.

I noticed then that we weren’t on the very top of the tower. There was something even above us — a huge cross, or maybe even a crucifix or Christ figure.

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Diabolical business

A new dream, from two nights ago.

I was at work. There were some problems with the receptionists. I don’t really remember much from this part of the dream.

Later I was told to see a guy, he was either some sort of boss or some sort of wiz kid at the company. They called him “Mr. L” [L being the name of the company]. He told me about a radical new technology they were developing. [I actually work at a software company.] They were mining for some rare material, and he showed me schematics of how they were drilling into certain rocks. These mines were now on the verge of collapse, so he told me they were going to go into the a new rock, next to the others.

He was now taking me into one of the current mines. It was a downward slope which after a short distance opened up to a rubble filled hall to the left, sloping upwards, back the same way. Suddenly the entrance collapsed, rocks tumbling down, and we were trapped. I was really scared, but suggested we had to start lifting rocks, to try to clear the entrance. Then we heard a deep, demonic voice: CLEAR IT. We both thought it was best to obey. I started lifting rocks away at the bottom of the path going up to the entrance, but the other guy was in the big hall instead. I was actually making some headway; a chain reaction caused rocks blocking the opening to fall away. But then I saw that the guy had made his way up the slope of the hall and was leaving through a crack, sort of next to where we had gone in but a little further away.

I made my way out of the mine. Now I heard chanting from a short distance away. I went toward it to investigate. It was a little ways into a forest — “Mr L” and some other people were conducting a demonic ritual. I was on a cliff above them. I can’t remember actually peering over the cliff and seeing them.

Next I was on the run through the forest. It was the demonic worshippers following me, but they seemed like people I knew now. The landscape was very steep to one side, down toward the sea. I kept trying to throw myself down the steep hills, to tumble down and quickly escape my pursuers. Although I would surely hurt myself on trees and rocks, I was certain it wouldn’t be too bad, and that I’d done it before. But somehow I just wasn’t able to do it, the incline wasn’t steep enough when I tried so I didn’t get anywhere.

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